Quick Take on the Hello Kitty Madness in Singapore

It takes a plush toy with no mouth to bring out the worst in some Singaporeans. After buying and hoarding N95 masks in bulk to profiteer from the haze in times of misfortune, entrepreneurial Singaporeans were at it again the previous night, buying and hoarding a limited edition black “Singing Bone Hello Kitty” from McDonald’s to resell at exorbitant prices.

Here is an awesome video of an equally awesome grown man cursing a poor staff at McDonald’s because he cannot get a black Hello Kitty to cuddle to sleep at night and will die of loneliness if that happens.

You can read the backstory over the incident via this Facebook post by the same lady who posted the video online.

Here is another awesome video of two Ah Bengs abusing a poor McDonald’s staff because they were told they can only buy two dolls per person instead of four. I teared after watching the video because I felt so sorry for these two poor guys. Why can’t McDonald’s staff understand that the average Singaporean male needs to have at least FOUR Hello Kitty dolls to hug at night in order to sleep well? 

Here is an awesome picture circulating online of a guy who will get laid at least 21 times because he has 21 black Hello Kitty dolls:

Only in Singapore would a grown man who collects Hello Kitty plush toys get lucky with girls.

Here are some awesome spoofs:

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I find it hilarious when I hear stories about random people who went to queue and buy the black Hello Kitty because they saw many others doing it. These people are not Hello Kitty fans, neither were they intending to flip it for a profit; they just buy because everyone else is doing so. Herd mentality at its best. The perfect testimony to our wonderful education system churning out drones.

I feel sorry for the genuine fans and collectors who have to compete with these people to get their full collection.

Anyway, if you are among those who die-die must get your hands on one of these dolls, why not consider ordering them directly from the China factories where they are made? 

Otherwise, I have another suggestion – take one of the old, white Hello Kitty dolls which you have queued and fought over during the last McDonald Hello Kitty craze and torch it. After that, use a chalk to draw a few white lines on the stomach. Voila! You have just made your own ultra limited edition black Hello Kitty which only you will have in the entire world!

It will definitely fetch a price higher than these on eBay:

At S$120,000 for a black Singing Bone Hello Kitty, the Singapore government should seriously consider investing in them and issuing these dolls to newly-wed couples as subsidies for their HDB down payment.

Maybe we can also offer a truckload of these to the Indonesian Minister who complained that S$1 million is too little to help them fight forest fire… This will help us get rid of the haze, once and for all.

Hail the almighty Chao-Ta Kitty!